Sharon Smith Coaching| Leadership Coach

Unlocking Your Best Life: Embracing a ‘Desired Life’ Approach for a Transformative 2024

As the new year begins, we look at setting new year resolutions and making positive changes in our lives for our betterment. I don’t believe in them. New Year Resolutions don’t work. They just become another reason to talk negatively to ourselves and give ourselves a hard time for not achieving success.

There’s nothing worse than not losing the weight you promised yourself you would lose. Or giving yourself a hard time about the gym membership you haven’t used. We set ourselves up for failure by adding something else to do to our ‘to-do’ list in life. And when we fail at something, often because we just don’t have the skillset or the time to make the changes, we then feel like we can validate our limiting beliefs further because we haven’t been successful.

For me, the start of a new year is a good time to complete a 360 review of where we are in life and where we want to go. I like to think of that as a ‘desired life review.’ Are we living the life we so desire? If not, what changes do we need to make so that desired life becomes our reality? When we frame any required changes as part of the wider desired life plan and consider how that will feel and be for us, then ‘resolutions’ become part of the journey, part of the day-to-day pathway towards our desired life.

Knowing where we are heading is important. It gives us motivation and drive and helps us piece together the jigsaw pieces of life. Too often in my life I have drifted and drifted and not challenged where I have ended up being or doing. And more often than not, those ‘places’ have not been right for me. Choosing and visualising where we want to go and what we want in our lives, allows for a more aligned and fulfilled life.  Otherwise, we just surf the wave of life, and often end up rudderless and without destination.

When you truly desire something, it lights up your belly and excites you. It drives you to succeed. But to truly desire something you really need to consider the feelings associated with that goal or outcome. What does your desired life feel like?

Indulge me for a minute…

Imagine living that life. Close your eyes and visualise yourself in your future life:

  • Where are you? What does it look like there? How do you feel in that place? Describe it.
  • What are you doing? How does it feel to be doing what you are doing?
  • Who are the people around you? What does it feel like to be in their company?
  • What do you look like? What is different about you? How do you feel about how you look?
  • What are your energy and motivation levels like? How is that different to now?
  • What does success feel like for you in this desired life?

Can you feel those feelings rise in your body as you consider your desired life? Those are the feelings that will take you to that place, and you want to capture and feel those feelings as often as possible.

When you are really clear on the feelings and emotions attached to your desired life, then you can then take those feelings, dreams and aspirations with you each and every day going forward in order to make that life a reality, knowing that each step you take in life is towards that destination and desired life.

Each step you take is an investment in you.

Your motivation increases and your inspiration rockets so that you have a raised frequency. You are no longer giving yourself a hard time about why you haven’t lost a few kilos, as your life has changed, you are more motivated, other things take priority, and as a result of your reframed mindset, you are losing weight without even trying!

Now, I’m not going to lie. You will hit bumps in the road. You won’t miraculously stay motivated every day, and there will be times that you are wondering, what the hell?!

But…one way to overcome those dips and troughs is to consider one word which is your accountability word. And it’s that simple word that you will use to help you regularly reflect as to whether you are on track towards your desired life. That word has the power to make you think back to your 360 review, think back to those feelings you felt when you imagined your desired life, and that one word will support you to reset again and work towards that life.

My word for this year is INVESTED. I now regularly check in with this word and use it as my reset button. If I find myself treading water, then I’m not investing in myself. I can then take the time to reflect on this and make deliberate changes to reset and recalibrate my thinking. To do that I go back to my feelings, I return to visualising and writing about the life I desire, and I reprogramme my mindset to get me back on track. Using the following journaling questions can also help that process:

  • Am I investing in myself, my home, my marriage, my business, my wellbeing?
  • Is every action I take an investment in me and mine?
  • What is the first thing I need to do to get back into the flow towards my desired life?

So, as I progress through 2024, I will spend some time nurturing my desired life. I know that each action and decision I make will be to support my accountability word of INVESTED. I know that word represents my desired life, and I can confidently say that I am working towards living my best and most exciting version of me yet!

I can support and help you get yourself on your way to your desired life. You too can leave behind the life-surfing that has got to where you are today, and help you learn what it is you want from your life, what your desired life looks like, and what your accountability word will be for this year as you work towards living your best life ever. Here’s a link to my ‘Work with Me’ form – https://forms.office.com/e/Cv42Hd4TNY please complete it and I will be in touch with you to tell you about the services I offer and what might be best for you in your circumstances.

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